Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Fuck the world

I'm so very very tired. I'm tired of the hate. I'm tired of the prejudice. I'm tired of being told I'm less of a person and I'm tired of dealing with this over and over and over again.

Today the newest anti-gay marriage initiative was certified. What this means is that the religious right will begin their campaign to fully remove all rights to gay marriage with absolutely no recognition for same-sex couples.

While this means that the current constitutional amendment that was passed last year to codify marriage as between one man and one woman with civil unions for same sex couples, will likely be defeated. That is to a degree good news, but not by much.

This also means that once this new amendment gets 65,825 signatures it will go before the legislature requiring only a 25% vote in two consecutive constitutional conventions. While we may have enough votes to stop a legistlative amendment (which requires simple majority - 50% +1 vote) there's not a lot of hope we can kill it outright at 25%.

I don't understand why people have so much hate in them. Why can't they leave us alone. Do they honestly think I chose this life? To have to fight constantly for repsect and recognition? How dare they say that this "lifestyle" is a choice.

I DIDN'T FUCKING CHOOSE TO BE GAY!!!

WHAT'S SO FUCKING HARD TO UNDERSTAND THAT I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH THIS BULLSHIT!!

I didn't want to be gay. I stayed in the closet for years hoping it was a phase, hoping the truth that I knew deep down was wrong. It didn't stop me from being gay. Nothing stopped me; not trying to date women, not being a part of a fraternity, NOTHING! Being gay is simply a part of who I am and at this point I wouldn' t change it for anything because it is who I am. But there are times that I get tired of fighting and convincing and campaigning to be treated like a fucking human being. Tomorrow or the next day I will get back up and resume the fight but for tonight I'm tired, simply tired.

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